CURRENTLY COOKING
THE SLATE.
Formats built the proper way — talent-first, trend-aware, journalism at the core, and always with a reason to exist beyond "it's a bit like that other thing."
6 × 60' TRUE CRIME
🇪 COSTA DEL CRIME
Sunshine. Sangria. Handcuffs.
The British organised crime kingpins who fled to the Costa del Sol — told through the women in their lives. The wives, the mothers, the daughters who lived it. With the biggest cases finally coming full circle, we can now tell the full story. Emma Kenny attached.
BRANDED / DOCUMENTARY
🇪 THE COSTA
British expats in Spain, without the clichés. The real ones — the grafters, the dreamers, the ones who came for a fortnight in 1998 and never quite went home. Warm, funny, and shot by people who actually live here.
OBSERVATIONAL SERIES
🇪 THE COSTA CAST
One street, one bar, one urbanisation per episode. A returning cast of genuine Costa characters you couldn't write — because we didn't. Real people, real stakes, proper storytelling engine.
TALENT FORMAT
🇪 SINK OR SPAIN
Rylan and Linda learn local trades in Spain — then have to run a real business with them. Actual jeopardy, actual jokes, actual jeopardy about the jokes.
WELLNESS CHAOS
✨ MY THERAPIST GHOSTED ME… IN IBIZA
Vogue Williams and Joanne McNally take wellness culture to the White Isle and lovingly dismantle it. Healing has never been this unhinged.
Commissioner? Production manager? Nosy competitor taking screenshots? Relax, we've got more where this came from. The decks are ready. The question is whether you are.
EMAIL DAVID@BALLSY.TVFROM THE BIN 🗑️ · CAUSE OF DEATH INCLUDED
💡 FORMATS WE MERCIFULLY KILLED.
Every great slate has a graveyard. Ours has a gift shop. Coroner's reports below — all genuine, all binned before anyone got hurt. Mostly.
🦑 Squid Game But It's Bingo
Legal said no. Nan said yes. Nan has instructed her own lawyers and the matter is ongoing.
🧼 Extreme Soap Carving With Reformed Gangsters
Surprisingly moving, tragically unfilmable. One of them carved a swan and cried. So did we. No one filmed it. That was the problem.
🛥️ Below Deck But It's A Pedalo
Sank. Literally, in development. The pilot is somewhere off Fuengirola. So is the pedalo.
🐓 Celebrity Cockerel Whisperer
The cockerel had representation. We couldn't afford him. He's since gone to Netflix. We wish him well. We don't.
🫒 Naked Attraction: Tapas Edition
The olives were fine. Everything else was an email with "URGENT" in the subject line.
🐐 The Goat Bachelor
The goat found love. Off camera. On our budget. The goat is fine. The goat is doing better than most of us.
🪦 Your Idea Here
Reserved. Every producer has one of these. If yours is genuinely good, email David. If it involves a cockerel, we've been burned before.
THE SUSPECTS 🚨
💡 WHO KEEPS PITCHING THESE? AN INVESTIGATION.
All four remain at large. All four remain available for hire. The justice system is broken.
THE STUFF WE DIDN'T BIN. 4,000,000 PEOPLE AGREE.
The point is: we have taste. It just occasionally needs supervision.
HOW THE SAUSAGE GETS MADE 🌭
💡 FROM NAPKIN TO COMMISSION.
- 💡 The idea — usually over breakfast, occasionally over something stronger. Talent-first, trend-led, or reactive when the news hands us a gift.
- ⚙️ The engine — Triggs builds the structure that makes episode six as watchable as episode one. No engine, no pitch. House rule.
- 🎬 The sizzle — shot here, cut here, scored to make a commissioner sit up. We don't send decks that read like homework.
- 🎯 The pitch — calibrated to the channel, the slot and the person across the table. Twenty years of knowing which button to press.
- 📺 The delivery — and because we're also the fixers, the thing we pitched is the thing we can actually make. Revolutionary, apparently.
